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There’s an article here at superbikeplanet.com that’s pretty damn funny. It’s a few years old but timeless nonetheless. While I don’t consider myself a golfer, I do enjoy getting out with the fellas on a company scramble, etc. where you can rely on someone else’s talent. But the reality is I suck at golf, but enjoy it when I make the time…if I’m drinking.

I have two main problems with golf - the price to play a decent course and the time to finish 18 holes. My options are usually to spend the $100 on grip-heaters, a Euro-stand, or crash bobbins. Those are tangible goods that will be there the next time I ride. The second thing is that I need to play 18 holes. Nine is just not enough variety, and 18 holes takes five hours never mind the ‘fivesome’ that always manages to play in front of me. Half of a day - heck thats a dirt bike outing. With my rationalization, its obvious why I have golfed twice since moving to AZ 3.5 years ago.

I’m self-taught (translation: I suck) and don’t take it too seriously. However, the author Dean Adams defined the dimension of golf that is clearly missing to qualify it as a sport: DANGER. Check it out…

(excerpt)…Golf is not a sport. Golf is an activity, like bowling, throwing horseshoes and playing dominoes. It takes skill, talent and practice to be good. But it is not a sport.

The difference between a true sport and an activity is that true sports have the added dimension of real danger to them. To be a pure sport, there must be a chance that if things go horribly wrong you may get your pelvis smashed or your life stolen away. True sports require skill, talent and practice, and they also require bravery. Some true sports carry the risk that if things go wrong, your body will momentarily lose control of its bowels. True sports require that participants know these dangers going in, but willingly take part anyway.

The entire article deserves a read. If you’re like me and can laugh at yourself (and more importantly others), you’ll enjoy yourself.